He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
