Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
