Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
