she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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