i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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