This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
