I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
