I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
