It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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