After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
What drink are we having for lunch?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Randomize
