11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
