He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He felt like a one man threesome
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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