Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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