I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
