He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
