Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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