Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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