Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
