ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
