idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
