since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize
