yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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