It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize