Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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