i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
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