We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Someone signed my nipple.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
