Do vagina's smell?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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