susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
