Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I think pants incapable of making pants work
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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