can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i just google imaged poop.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
