just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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