it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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