we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
