Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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