Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
