it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
