But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
