i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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