Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
