You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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