Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize