after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
