We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
