OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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