I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
