How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
