Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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