if you like me you must not know who I am
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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