Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
