you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
