is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
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