He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
